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kurtbraunohler:

Last night I got an unprompted text from a random number. I went with it.

kurtbraunohler:

Last night I got an unprompted text from a random number. I went with it.

molotowcocktease:

thepoetspace:

xionin:

Nominee for best dad ever.

I fucking love this man.

100% like my daddy

kyleblueocelot2799:

ultrafacts:

 More Ultrafacts

It looks like you’re being eaten by an albino pac-man

kyleblueocelot2799:

ultrafacts:

 More Ultrafacts

It looks like you’re being eaten by an albino pac-man

sxrreal:

When I say “please don’t take a picture of me” it’s not because I’m being bitchy and stubborn, it’s because if I see that picture I will seriously feel so bad about myself and think I am the ugliest thing on earth and sink a little deeper into self consciousness and hatred.

itssexualhour:

So I went over to my boyfriend’s house tonight, and we decided to go night swimming. Well, we were kissing and grinding and all that in the pool and suddenly he just hugs me to him and says ‘I love you, and I’m glad you’re mine’ and when he said that I leaned in towards his ear and said ‘mine’ in the same voice as those seagulls from Finding Nemo and then he did it back and we basically sat in the pool shouting ‘MINE!’ at each other for a solid minute.

jamesfactscalvin:

the-silence-in-the-library:

commodore-cliche:

Texts from superheroes.

this is gold

"We are like kin!"

hot4triangle:

when i saw this i assumed theyd pranked the guy by changing his actual physical reflection into mr.bean and it didnt occur to me for like another good minute afterward to question how that might have happened